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“Dating is easy!” ..said no one ever! It takes time, effort, commitment, resilience and a little bit of luck to find Mr. Right. Still there are quality guys in Boston, or ladies like you wouldn’t continue to put in the effort. This dating guide empowers you to take charge of your dating life so that you can find the man that you deserve.
While it can certainly be difficult, enjoy the single process. Keep a positive attitude about being single, enjoy your own personal time and continue staying in touch with friends. Far too often, dating can become an all-consuming enterprise that sucks the joy out of the dating process and even their life. That doesn’t have to be you.
You don’t need to go to the bar to meet a great guy. You can find the right kind of man simply by going to the places you already enjoy. Love staying active? Take a few gym classes and see who catches your eye. Whether it is at your favorite bookstore, coffee shop or sporting event, the more open you are to meeting people, the greater your chance for success will be. The point is, there are great guys all around you, so keep your eyes open and you just might find the man of your dreams where you’d least expect to find him.
So, let’s say you’ve settled into a consistent dating routine. You’ve started talking to guys that seem great, but ultimately the coffee date or date night arrives and there just isn’t much chemistry. Often, the problem is with the guy, but there are also dating mistakes and habits that you can avoid making as well.
For one, don’t get down on yourself if a date didn’t turn into anything more. As part of staying positive about the process, simply remind yourself of the obvious fact that there are plenty of great guys, but that doesn’t mean they’re a great match for you. It’s a process so look forward to the next one. Also, don’t get too invested too soon. In today’s day and age, that means avoiding frequent and aggressive texting. After all, dating is fun, so being a little flirtatious is fine, but too available can get lost in translation and typically comes off as desperate. Remember even the most simple texts can be misconstrued. Similarly, avoid opening up too much and spilling a lot of baggage on a date early on when you are still in the “getting to know each other” phase. While honesty is good, nobody likes having somebody’s “real life” dumped on them on a first or second date. Simply take the time to get to know your date, and opening up will come about in its due course.
Finally, don’t date a man if you’re expecting to change him. Even if you love everything else about him, understand that men typically don’t change once they reach a mature age. So, if the thing you want to change is truly a “deal breaker”, it’s probably best for you to just keep searching for someone without the same flaws.
Getting to know the city where you’re dating is almost as important as knowing yourself and the men you’re dating. Fortunately, Boston has great dating options for almost any age group, hobby and passion. If you love food and nightlife, find a great restaurant with a jazz club nearby. For sports lovers, Boston is in a league of its own with the Red Sox, Patriots, Bruins and Celtics which all make for great conversation starters in this sports-obsessed city.
If sports aren’t your thing, maybe you love the outdoors. In that case, Boston’s Emerald Necklace Conservancy is as beautiful and lovely as the name suggest and the Boston Common is a wonderful date spot as well. Finally, if you love history and culture, Boston is a great dating locale as well, so be sure to schedule dates at the many museums and historical locations the city has to offer. In short, Boston is filled with fun date activities that can reflect your personality and keep you having fun through the dating process.
The adage that “the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over while expecting a different result”couldn’t be more true when it comes to dating. Executive Matchmaker, Jill Vandor of LunchDates has a unique perspective on this. “It’s human nature to find yourself attracted to a certain type. Over the years I have seen so many failed relationships because men and women both tend to date the same type of person over and over again while neglecting to see that they are falling into the same patterns in their relationships.” If you find yourself in a dating rut because you keep falling for the wrong guys or simply aren’t finding any good ones, maybe it’s time to step back and let a professional take over.
A professional Boston matchmaker can save you valuable time while meeting screened and interviewed dates that are as serious about the relationship process as you are. As such, you can avoid the Russian Roulette of online dating and similar dating strategies that begin to get old after one too many bad dates.
This guide highlights a few great ways that you can formalize a dating strategy. You may want to implement all of these suggestions or a few, but the key takeaway is to make a dating plan. After all, you can’t get to planning a wedding without finding a guy worth walking down the aisle with, so stick to these proven dating strategies and dating success will come in short order.
