Dating apps offer up a lot of people to choose from. And most agree that online dating is a great way to meet other singles. It all sounds tempting when you’re first diving into the dating scene – “first” being the operative word here. It gets old fast, believe me. We’ve all heard the stories of how frustrating online dating is. Whether you’re ready to download the next app or doing a dating app purge, here’s what you need to know before your next swipe.
Why is this important to point out? Many people are unaware that they’re actually using a dating service when I talk to them. “I’m not interested in a (matchmaking) dating service. I’m all set.” Really? Any meetup app on your phone is your dating service. It’s just a free or really cheap one. Professional matchmakers are the “top shelf” option when it comes to love, which is why LunchDates has been around for over 35 years.
Most Bostonians would agree knowledge is power, so here you go. The majority of dating apps out there are owned by the same company. Match Group owns upwards of 45 different dating sites, including Match.com, Tinder and OkCupid. It also recently tried to acquire Bumble, though unsuccessfully. So yes, each app has its own idiosyncrasies, but understand that the endgame for dating apps, which is money, all goes back to one place.
Phantom swipe matches come along and then disappear. One minute you’re within 10 miles of someone you’ve matched with, and then a day later, they’re 1000 miles away. If you’re close to the city and using a GPS-based app, you’re matching with anyone traveling for business or pleasure. Try to avoid any profiles that note Logan Airport as a location. Holiday weekends are also a culprit due to the large number of people traveling to visit family.
#1 Bumble – For this city, Bumble wins out hands down. Why? Because Bostonians are all about girl power. Women make the first move on this app. And Boston men know that smart, sexy ladies are on Bumble. Plus, its swiping ability makes it easy and quick to peruse through a ton of people.
Downside? Bumble’s algorithms place profiles that have the most swipe rights to the front of your pile. It shows you the most attractive people first, even if they’re actually not active on Bumble. This means you could be swiping right and not getting a lot of matches.
#2 Match.com – There’s a good reason Match.com dominates the dating app space. If you’re over 40, Match is your best bet, with almost half of its members between the ages of 30-49 years old, this site is better for those just starting out. Eventually, the more savvy daters end up juggling free apps.
Downside? That dating pool you think is so big? Think again. Not everyone who emails you and winks at you is a real person. Between scammers and bots soliciting singles, you never know who’s on the other side of the screen. If anyone (and this includes the dating app) is asking for money in order to chat with another person, be wary.
#3 Tinder – Did I mention I like bad boys? I have a love-hate relationship with Tinder. It is the most widely used dating app worldwide. That means you have access to the largest pool of people. However, there will be a lot of shirtless selfies to swipe left on in order to get to a decent person.
Downside? It’s Tinder. You know what you’re getting yourself into. Fish pics, car selfies, bathroom selfies, selfies of body parts, sexy couple pics. It’s all there. But if you have the tenacity to sort through hundreds of profiles, you may find a gem. Just make sure they’re local and actually single.
There are people who have found compatible partners through dating apps. Unfortunately, it’s not the % you want to hear. It’s between 5 and 12%, and that could change over time. Online dating is great if you want to get out there and date a lot of people. But most people who end up in relationships will do so through an introduction from a mutual friend. And that’s why singles come to LunchDates. They want to work with a professional dating service. A matchmaker is like your best friend with hundreds of singles to introduce you to!
Aimee Burke has over a decade of experience as a relationship coaching professional. She is an avid writer and researcher for the Boston dating scene. She’s also the main contributor to LunchDates’ dating advice blog.